The S-Classes That I Raised

근서 - Geunseo

Chapter 27 - OFF (3)

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< OFF (3) >

“Han Yoojin-ssi?”

Kim Sunghan worriedly looked at the man across from him at the table.

The gla.s.s that had fallen from the man’s, Han Yoojin’s, hand rolled until it caught against a plate and stopped. The spilled alcohol dripped drop by drop from the table to below.

“Are you alright?”

At the question, Han Yoojin slightly shook his head. Then, he sighed deeply.

“Kim Sunghan-ssi.”

He sighed consecutively and raised his drooping head. Looking at the half unfocused eyes and reddened skin, anyone would be able to tell that he was extremely drunk.

“It seems like you are very drunk. Let’s get up.”

“No, wait.”

Han Yoojin shook his hand in refusal.

Despite being drunk, it was a clear, correctly p.r.o.nounced voice, so Kim Sunghan soon had a confused expression. Was that person really drunk?

“There is still something I need to do.”

“Something you need to do?”

“Yes, I don’t want to do it but… there is no other choice. Ah, really why this, this kind of……”

He mumbled something and then rubbed his face with both hands. It was an expression that said he really didn’t want to, so it made you wonder what exactly he was going to do.

“If you tell me in detail, I can help you.”

“Help… um, no. Just please sit still. And please don’t laugh. And please don’t treat me like a crazy guy. You just have to sit solemnly like normal… Yes.”

Then he let out another extremely deep sigh[1].

Han Yoojin took out ice from the pitcher and rubbed it against his cheek with a face that looked like it might even cry. It seemed like he thought he was doing something to recover his senses.

“This really isn’t my real thoughts, Kim Sunghan-ssi.”

“Yes.”

“But still, if it is okay, can you sincerely listen? I, really don’t want to be like that. But I think I definitely have to speak now with this chance.”

“Please speak.”

Kim Sunghan unconsciously straightened his posture. It certainly seemed as if he was like that because he was drunk, but instead of drunken antics, he seemed too normal.

Could it be that he was about to speak up about actually important things?

The Han Yoojin he had been watching for the last few days was someone who was concealing many secrets. If it weren’t for the fact that he was definitely Haeyeon Guild’s older brother, he would have been entirely suspicious. Instead of someone who had just registered as an Awakened Person, he knew too much and was too skilled.

You couldn’t help but tilt your ear toward him, who was saying that there was something he needed to say, while he was drunk, at the moment when his wariness was peeled off.

“Kim Sunghan-ssi.”

“Yes.”

The tips of Han Yoojin’s lips trembled slightly. After hesitating, he finally spilled his innermost thoughts.

“I love you.”

“……Excuse me?”

Kim Sunghan asked back, with the stupidest expression he’d ever had in his 30 odd years of life. The one phrase that struck his ear couldn’t connect to his brain right away and instead felt like it was spinning around nearby.

Continuing, the feelings that burst out were colorful in various ways like fireworks.

It was disconcerting and dumbfounding and even funny. The antic.i.p.ation had completely collapsed and there was a feeling of disappointment, but at the same time, he felt a humane friendliness from thinking ‘that man is also inevitably like that when drunk’.

Overall, it wasn’t bad. No, it was quite delightful.

“You really do confess when you are drunk.”

Kim Sunghan swallowed down the belated laugh and said.

“If that was what you need to do, since you’ve done it, let’s go back now.”

“What I have to do? Oh, right.”

Han Yoojin rubbed his face again.

“Did I, by any chance, say I love you?”

At him earnestly asking again, laughter eventually burst out. Kim Sunghan cleared his throat and nodded his head.

“You did.”

“Really? That’s crazy. No, I didn’t mean what Sunghan-ssi said. But, I said I love you?”

“Yes.”

“Really? Then why… oh, it did pop up? When did it pop up?”

After saying the words he[2] couldn’t understand, he dispiritedly laughed hahaha. As Kim Sunghan looked Han Yoojin doing that, he felt a peculiar feeling of déjà vu.

It was his first time drinking with him. It was definitely the first, but strangely, it wasn’t unfamiliar. It felt like he had seen that kind of drunken appearance before.

No, he definitely had seen it before.

Kim Sunghan rooted through his memory. It wasn’t a very old memory. He had seen it about two years ago. And before then too, when he was young.

‘……Grandfather.’

Suddenly, it occurred to him. Kim Sunghan took in a small breath.

His grandfather.

An emaciated elder who, when tipsy, would laugh ‘huh-huh’ while saying ‘I love you’ to the grandchild his heartless son had thrown away.

The memory of wrinkled hands that were like a piece of wood, that would rub his head and pat his back, vividly rose up.

‘…Even though he is someone almost ten years younger than me. Am I drunk too?’

Looking at the extremely young[3] youth, he remembered the seventy-year-old elder. It was to the point of mixing them up.

But that strange feeling of distance quickly disappeared as if erased with great strength.

Leaving only the deep feelings for the elder who was his excellent guardian.

Of course, it wasn’t that Han Yoojin was becoming Kim Sunghan’s real grandfather. They were different people. He knew that clearly.

But that didn’t matter.

The important thing was the fact that there was someone who he could wholeheartedly believe in, someone who he could occasionally think of and rely on.

In this world where you couldn’t even easily trust your flesh and blood, an existence that felt completely safe could only be tempting. And reasons to reject that temptation were eliminated.

Kim Sunghan smiled.

“You seem very drunk.”

He said, straightening up. Han Yoojin gazed up blankly at the Kim Sunghan who was moving towards him.

“…I am sorry but I, have to say that I love you.”

“You have said so.”

“Ah…so I said it. I said it? s.h.i.t, that’s not it…”

Kim Sunghan grabbed the arm of the drunk continuing to speak nonsense and helped him up.

Han Yoojin surprisingly walked as if completely fine, without a single wobble. It was to the point that if it weren’t for his nagging about love and dazed eyes, you really wouldn’t be able to tell he was drunk.

“I’m sorry. I’m not like this because I want to be.”

“It’s alright.”

“Since you said it’s alright, I’ll just say one more thing.”

After saying ‘just one more thing’, he looked up at the man who was sincerely propping him up.

“I love you.”

He was going to laugh it off again. But Kim Sunghan suddenly remembered something.

That unlike when he was younger, he, who had grown up to be a stiff person and emphasized having face, had always pa.s.sed over the elder’s drunk behavior without an answer.

“…Me too.”

So he brought out the words he hadn’t used since he was in his teens.

“I loved you.”

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Grandfather.

I got up and sat down and turned on my cell phone again.

‘I should check…’

I didn’t want to call. I did say that I tended to confess when I was drunk, but would I have really said ‘I love… you’ to when I was drunk?

…I probably just calmly said it once, right? I didn’t say useless things, right?

I swallowed dryly several times, before grimly pressing the call buton. It’s okay. Nothing much happened. It’s oka…

[Yes, this is Kim Sunghan.]

“H-h.e.l.lo. Sunghan-ssi.”

My voice trembled faintly on its own. It wouldn’t have trembled as much as this even when calling a first love after ten years.

“That, by any chance did I, yesterday… come home quietly…?”

Say that I did, please.

Over the cell phone, I head a small laugh. f.u.c.k. That was ominous.

[Despite being drunk, you were fine.]

“I-is that so?”

Whew, that’s really a relie…

[Besides telling me that you love me about thirty times.]

…Thirty ways to kill myself flashed through my head.

That’s crazy, what did I do? Couldn’t I be returned to the past just one more time? G.o.d, please. If you could blow away the drunk idiot with a shotgun, there would be nothing more I could want.

“I’ve caused you so many… extremely… really a lot, of inconveniences[5]……”

I said, as if my voice was wrung out of me. I was crazy, really. Han Yoojin, you crazy b.a.s.t.a.r.d. Saying something that could be done with once, thirty…… s.h.i.t.

My nape was burning. I was dying of shame. I felt like I had already died about halfway.

“I’m really sorry… I really, really wasn’t in my right mind. It must have been very unpleasant, I would like to wholeheartedly apologize.”

[It’s alright. It wasn’t unpleasant at all.]

……Sorry?

Immediately my thoughts froze. W-wait? That it wasn’t unpleasant, what did you mean? If it were me I would have been like ‘f.u.c.k this crazy b.a.s.t.a.r.d, if you’re going to get drunk, get drunk nicely’ and kicked them away, but it wasn’t unpleasant at all?

……Could it be that it was that preference?

My spine straightened up. I’d rather you get mad. Why was it okay? Please get mad. I want to hear you say ‘crazy b.a.s.t.a.r.d’.

“T-that… Still, the location was like that… you must have felt bad……”

Kim Sunghan laughed. Don’t laugh, I get gooseb.u.mps.

[If it was a different person, it might have been annoying and unpleasant. But.]

But, but… but what.

I firmly repressed the urge to throw the cell phone and waited for the following words.

[Hm, you might think this sounds weird, but.]

…Should I throw it at least now. S-something that sounds weird… what is it.

[For some reason, when I look at Han Yoojin-ssi, I think of my deceased grandfather.]

……Excuse me? W-what? Grandfather? Grandpa[6]?!

[1] lit. ‘ground-sinking sigh’

[2] this ‘he’ refers to KSH and then 2nd ‘he’ in this sentence refers to YJ

[3] lit. ‘deep blue-ly young’ but the word for ‘deep/clear blue’ can also be used to mean ‘very young’

[4] said & written in eng, with the capital letters

[5] he’s trying to say lit. ‘I’ve had a lot of bad manners’ which is a polite way of saying ‘excuse me’, ‘I’ve inconvenienced you’, ‘please forgive me for the troubles I’ve caused you’, etc.

[6] both words mean ‘grandfather’ but the 1st one is a slightly respectful way to referring to (and only referring to, you don’t use it to call someone ‘grandfather’ to their face) someone’s grandfather, whereas the 2nd is just a general word that you can also use to call someone.

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